1. Funny Online Dating Intros
2. Funny Introductions For Dating Sites List
3. Funny Opening Lines Dating
4. Funny Introductions For Dating Sites For People

When sending a first message on a dating site, you’re often better off saying “knock knock” rather than “hello.” A funny message stands out to online daters, and it increases your chances of getting a response. Sometimes you can melt the hearts of jaded online daters with a clever quip or a quirky compliment. If you're not sure how to introduce yourself on a dating site or app, try out these fun options. Basic First Message Examples Just as you would introduce yourself to someone in real life, start with a form of 'hello' and the short version of why you're reaching out.

Funny Dating Quotes to get you in the mood for a hot dude. Or dudess. These will put you in the right frame for the night game. Laughter is the best aphrodisiac.

Dating Quotes
Group 1

Funny Online Dating Intros

I’ve been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog.
- Wendy Liebman

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
- Woody Allen

What is a date, really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only difference is there aren’t many job interviews where you’ll wind up naked.
- Jerry Seinfeld
Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again.
- Susan Healy

Funny Dating Quotes
Group 2

On a date I wonder if there’s going to be any sex. And if I’m going to be involved.
- Garry Shandling

I went on a date recently and the guy took me horseback riding. That was kind of fun, until we ran out of quarters.
- Susie Loucks
My sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners!
- Sarah Silverman
I went out to dinner with a Marine. He looked at me and said, “I could kill you in seven seconds.” I go, “I’ll just have toast then.”
- Margaret Smith
I asked this one girl out and she said, “You got a friend?” I said yes. She said, “Then go out with him.”
- Don Irreva

I dated a hypnotist once. She was the hottest, smartest, skinniest, funniest, kindest, most glamorous and sophisticated woman I’ve ever met.
- Kent Graham @KentWGraham

Funny Dating Quotes
Group 3

My father always said, “Be the kind they marry, not the kind they date.” So on our first date I’d nag the guy for a new dishwasher.
- Kris McGaha
I hate first dates. I made the mistake of telling my date a lie about myself, and she caught me. I didn’t think she’d actually demand to see the bat cave.
- Alex Reed
I know a guy who breaks up with women all the time. He calls it “going home in the morning.”
- (Unknown Author)

I miss dating The excitement of meeting someone new, that feeling of butterflies when you see if you can climb out their bathroom window...
- MF FairyPrincessSmoo ‏@Smooheed

You can tell how single I am by the way my cat and dog wear their sombreros with quiet dignity and acceptance.
- Angie Davis ‏@Adar79Angie

Funny Dating Quotes
Group 4

The best part about speed dating is having 8-10 new guys to drink with, and none of them are keeping track of how many drinks you've had.
- Miss Moneypenny ‏@MoneypennyNaked

Funny Introductions For Dating Sites List

My boyfriend does this cute thing where he files for a restraining order.
- Eden Dranger ‏@Eden_Eats

Date: [looking at menu] Want to share anything?
Me: Oh. I made out with your brother once....God that feels good to get off my chest. You?
- Amanda Hugnkiss ‏@caliluvgirl77

Guy: You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
Girl: You just want to have sex with me.
Guy: Wow, you’re smart too, I like that.
- Your Mom ‏@HorribleDancer

My girlfriend said I was too controlling, and it wasn't her turn to speak.
- C'est la vie ‏@Robert_Beau

Funny Dating Quotes
Group 5

An online dating site for really old people called Carbon Dating.
- Kelkulus ‏@kelkulus

Funny Opening Lines Dating

Hi mom and dad, meet my new boyfriend, Netflix
- Swishergirl @Swishergirl24

[determined not to have any awkward silence during date]
'So, what's your favorite part of a banana?'
- Brent ‏@murrman5

Told a girl she's more attractive when she's not wearing glasses and she said I'm also more attractive when she's not wearing glasses.
- Kevin O'Neill ‏@KevinBuffalo

I just cancelled a date for tonight & told the dude I was sprayed by a skunk. Who would make that up? Me. I would make that up.
- Kate ‏@Juststopkate

Funny Dating Quotes
Group 6

Dating is where you pretend you’re someone you’re not to impress someone you don’t know.
- Melanie White
I like to date schoolteachers. If you do something wrong, they make you do it over again.
- Rodney Dangerfield
Save a boyfriend for a rainy day, and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West
Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion.
- Scott Adams
Kissing is our greatest invention. On the list of great inventions, it ranks higher than the Thermos bottle and the Airstream trailer; higher, even, than room service.
- Tom Robbins
A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.
- Ingrid Bergman

The main lesson I took from Lady and the Tramp is that dating below your station might result in someone who can get you free spaghetti.
- MehGyver @AndrewNadeau0

One day, some guy is gonna see me eating a whole rotisserie chicken with my bare hands in my parked car and think 'That's her, she's the one.'
- Eden Dranger @Eden_Eats

Funny Introductions For Dating Sites For People

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